Foodtimes and Boy Scouts

Hey there...

Sorry for not posting much lately. Part of it has been a pretty heavy workload which didn't leave me much time or energy for posting. Part of it has been spotty internet access recently. Part of it has been pure, unadulterated slacking on my part.

AND I'LL DO IT AGAIN SOMETIME IF I FEEL LIKE IT SO THAR!

That's right! I said it! ..Cause I'm all rebel-ly like that.

Today, we had a drill. See, a couple of weeks ago, there was a reasonably intense firefight late at night. Small arms fire was pretty close sounding. Usually it's muffled by the multiple walls, but some of these weren't, which tends to point to it being closer rather than farther away. And then some pretty loud explosions which shook the hooch a tad. Also, word on the gravel (ha! I am so clever!) is that a couple of bad guy doofuses actually tried to broach the wall. To put it mildly, they were unsuccessful.

Nonetheless, it was decided that we would have a drill to test our defenses.

So today, we had a drill. Which required everyone to act as if the perimeter had been breached and everyone had to wear kevlar and helmet anytime they were outside and no driving around etc etc.

Did I mention it was 109F today? And that because we were "under attack" the DFAC was takeout only?

Now me, I have a couple of problems with that, because I am fat and like my foodtimes.

First, it's 109F. With a wind, it feels like you're living in the world largest hair dryer. Second, it's a LONG DAMN WALK to the DFAC. In the worlds largest hairdryer. Third, you're wearing 30lbs of armor on this long damn walk in the worlds largest hair dryer. Fourth, you have to wash your hands before entering the DFAC. Which makes no sense when you can only get takeout, but whatever. Fifth, you have to walk BACK, with your food, and your armor, in the worlds largest hair dryer.

Beleive me when I tell you, there is no food on the planet that good. Not even an ice cold beer in a frosty mug held between the buxom breasts of an 18 year old German bier maid is worth that.

Also, in a real scenario you can plain forget on the DAC being accessible at all. Or anyone being stupid enough to risk their life to make the journey. Nonetheless, because it's only a drill the DFAC is open and all you have to do is bake yourself alive to get there.

OTOH, I was a boyscout. I had my tunafish and crackers at my desk for lunch in the cool AC'd building.

What, you didn't think I was dumb enough to walk out there in THAT?!?!??

Look, if it's ever a real situation, no one is going anywhere for hours if not days. That's just common sense. I mean, YOU can go out in the firefight for a Mars bar and Pepsi if you really want, but me, I'm hding behind as much steel and concrete as I can find. So I have a decent stock of jerky, canned soups, tunafish and crackers and bottles of water and power bars. If I have to work late or miss a meal I'm still okay, if I get locked down, I'm still okay. When the place turns all pygmalion I'll be King! AHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHA!!! ...What?

It's like living in a hurricane all the time. Your motto should be "What do I need to hunker down here for a couple days?" If it's not, then you deserve to bake the idea into your brain walking 1/2 a mile in 109F temps wearing 30lbs of armor. :p

Regards,
-Bouncer-